Men's Pearls of Wisdom......

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  • Astraltraveller
    General

    • Jul 2006
    • 4006

    Men's Pearls of Wisdom......

    1. When I was born, I was given a choice - A big d*@k or a good memory. I don't remember, what I chose.

    2. Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.

    3. A wife is a sex object. Every time you ask for sex, she objects.

    4. Impotence: Nature's way of saying 'No hard feelings...'

    5. There are only two four letter words that are offensive to men - 'don't' and 'stop', unless they are used together.

    6. Panties: Not the best thing on earth, but next to the best thing on earth.

    7. There are three stages of sex in a man's life: Tri Weekly, Try Weekly, and Try Weakly.

    8. Virginity can be cured.

    9. Virginity is not dignity, its lack of opportunity.

    10. Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.

    11. I tried phone sex once, but the holes in the dialer were too small.

    12. Marriage is the only war where you get to sleep with the enemy.

    13. Q: What's an Australian kiss?
    A: The same thing as a French kiss, only down under.

    14. A couple just married were happy with the whole thing. He was happy with the Hole and she was happy with the Thing......

    15. Q: What are the three biggest tragedies in a mans life?
    A: Life sucks, job sucks, and the wife doesn't.

    16. Q: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
    A: Breasts don't have eyes.

    17.Despite the old saying, ' Don 't take your troubles to bed', many men still sleep with their wives!!


    Manny(THE ALIEN LEADER)
    Click Here to See the Vodaliens Album & Join the Club!! Sendyour personal photo to be alienated to the Vodalien Group


    www.astralengineering.net
    www.masqueradecreations.com
  • sedona
    Major General

    • Jun 2007
    • 2177

    #2
    Re: Men's Pearls of Wisdom......

    WAY too funny!
    Ken

    If there hadn't been women we'd still be squatting in a cave eating raw meat, because we made civilization in order to impress our girl friends. And they tolerated it and let us go ahead and play with our toys. Orson Wells

    Comment

    • Marincky
      General

      • Apr 2006
      • 4539

      #3
      Re: Men's Pearls of Wisdom......

      LOL
      Don't aim for success if you want it; just do what you love and believe in, and it will come naturally.

      Comment

      • C L
        General

        • Jul 2006
        • 5561

        #4
        Re: Men's Pearls of Wisdom......

        ahhhhhaha

        Too funny Manny.......lmbo!!!

        Comment

        • jkadin
          Brigadier General

          • Jan 2008
          • 1478

          #5
          Re: Men's Pearls of Wisdom......

          good one funny
          sigpicJoe
          Funny Jokes and Redneck Pics

          www.anytime-figurines.com


          "laughter is the best medicine"
          The most wasted of all days is one without laughter. ~e.e. cummings

          Comment

          • SAman
            Major General

            • Mar 2007
            • 2009

            #6
            Re: Men's Pearls of Wisdom......

            Very good........
            Mike

            Any excuse for non performance only weakens the charactor

            In God We Trust

            Comment

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