common' what do ya say girls?-

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  • ez-ez
    Special Status

    • Mar 2006
    • 1329

    #16
    Re: common' what do ya say girls?-

    Originally posted by circuspet.com
    real storie:

    The bets burn I ever had as a young man happened one night in the disco. I was dancing with all the women and not paying too much attention to any of them and kept noticing this really hot chick checking me out all night long. After the club closed and everyone was leaving
    she steped up to me , looked me up and down, then handed me slip of paper and said call me in and hour. I thought to myself, "booty call". So I hurried home brushed my teeth, put on some more aftershave, and called the number she had given me, only to be answered,"Hello this is dial a prayer". I can't remember the girl but I'll never forget the laugh she gave me.
    ROFL

    Man.. did you get counselling for that..?? .. I know I would.. lol

    From now on, I'll be hanging round the night clubs with a laptop with the white pages installed on it for 'on the spot phone number cross check'.

    Comment

    • ez-ez
      Special Status

      • Mar 2006
      • 1329

      #17
      Re: common' what do ya say girls?-

      Man: "My you are so beautiful!"
      Woman: "Ayup, Im drunk too!"

      Man: “I know how that feels.. didn’t I just say you’re beautiful?”

      Man: "Haven't we met before?"
      Woman: "Yes, I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic."
      Man: “Ahhh.. that’s right.. you’re the new chik they hired coz you have the most experience”


      Man: "Haven't I seen you someplace before?
      Woman: "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."
      Man: “awww.. still in pain, huh?”


      Man: "Is this seat empty?"
      Woman: "Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down."
      Man: “No sweetheart.. not for me.. I was just wondering why aren’t you resting your other butt cheek on it”


      Man: "So, wanna go back to my place ?"
      Woman: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"
      Man: “Don’t be silly.. the rock is hanging over your side of the bed and it only falls after we’re done.”


      Man: "Your place or mine?"
      Woman: "Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine."
      Man: “oooooh… phone sex freak, ey?”


      Man: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?"
      Woman: "It's in the phone book."
      Man: "But I don't know your name."
      Woman: "That's in the phone book too."
      Man: “Fine, so can you get off the seat so I can get the phone book, shorty?”


      Man: "So what do you do for a living?"
      Woman: "I'm a female impersonator."
      Man: “Sorry, but you aint doing a good job”


      Man: "What sign were you born under?"
      Woman: "No Parking."
      Man: “oh, so why do you look like ‘buy one get one for free?”


      Man: "Hey, baby, what's your sign?"
      Woman: "Do not Enter"
      Man: “Full, huh?”


      Man: "How do you like your eggs in the morning?"
      Woman: "Unfertilized !"
      Man: “I’m hoping you have X-Large ******* in your bag”


      Man: "Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason"
      Woman: "Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!"
      Man: “Can I tape it on video?’


      Man: "I'm here to fulfill your every sexual fantasy."
      Woman: "You mean you've got both a donkey and a Great Dane?"
      Man: “Nah.. my poor donkey died.. I’m looking for a replacement”


      Man: "I know how to please a woman."
      Woman: "Then please leave me alone."
      Man: “Sure thing.. here’s a spare set of ‘Double A’ batteries.. you’ll need’em”


      Man: "I want to give myself to you."
      Woman: "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."
      Man: “Who said anything about a gift..!! You gonna have to pay, sunshine”


      Man: "I can tell that you want me."
      Woman: "Ohhhh. You're so right. I want you to leave."
      Man: “Before or after breakfast?”


      Man: "If I could see you naked, I'd die happy:
      Woman: "Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing."
      Man: “I know, it does look funny when your genitals is longer than your legs”


      Man: "Hey cutie, how 'bout you and I hitting the hot spots?"
      Woman: "Sorry, I don't date outside my species.."
      Man: “Point taken.. so shall we say ‘the dog show theatre’ 8pm Wednesday night’?


      Man: "Your body is like a temple."
      Woman: "Sorry, there are no services today."
      Man: “Shame.. I’m a Hindu and warship the cow.. it’s hard to come by a goddess like you”


      Man: "I'd go through anything for you."
      Woman: "Good! Let's start with your bank account."
      Man: “awww.. how sweet.. and you even wanna pay my mortgage..”


      Man: "I would go to the end of the world for you.
      Woman: "Yes, but would you stay there?"

      Man: “Sure, but would you travel all that distance every time you feel you want some since I’m the only one who’ll do it?”

      Comment

      • FPRob
        Colonel

        • Aug 2006
        • 955

        #18
        Re: common' what do ya say girls?-

        Exactly :) We're covered fellas LOL, Carlos has got us covered :)

        FPRULES


        Comment

        • Code-Burnt-Gemini
          Major

          • Jul 2006
          • 278

          #19
          Re: common' what do ya say girls?-

          LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOO !!! You da MAN Carlos!
          brenT

          Comment

          • ez-ez
            Special Status

            • Mar 2006
            • 1329

            #20
            Re: common' what do ya say girls?-

            I wish I never did that, but I as you prolly could tell, we get real bored at work.. after I did that post I thought I put it in an email on the company's network.. everyone got it.. thank god I made it from 'Ananymous'.. The girls weren't too impressed and because they didn't know who distributed the email, they went after all of us.. the roport so far:

            2 Guys found stabbed in the lifts;
            4 Guys had to be taken to ER to have their phone headsets removed as for some reason they were covered in super glu;
            2 Guys Received letters with 'Anthrax' traces;
            5 Guys got their willies caught in mouse traps in the men's toilet urinels.. 6 more mouse traps were found undetonated;
            All training videos were replaced with Woddy Allen and Jean Claude Van Damme movies;
            3 guys found live wild cobra snakes under their car seats;
            But the most serious act which now have us all in fear is.. 3 Guys received Penis Pumps in a package with a card in saying: 'I thought I'd get you something useful this year..'

            Comment

            • kassi59
              Major General

              • Nov 2005
              • 2771

              #21
              Re: common' what do ya say girls?-

              You get the 'wonderful' award Carlos!.......good come backs!.....
              but you do know that back n forth could go on for ever dontcha?.....lol

              Comment

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